It's been more than 2 weeks i guess, since i applied for this job an d i got hired. I even think that the Boss is the kind of person who is cool, frank and smart, a Boss that i like. I waited for 2 weeks and hoping that the Gov't will Approved my / our application. with that two weeks i prepare my self by reading about Bartending, trying to remember all the concoction. I cannot wait anymore because i really really wanted to work.
So, the 2 weeks finally came and i was so excited and nervous to ask for a new update from my "future" boss, his voice sound okay and happy, no trace of sadness so it gave me positive hope. I can feel the Good News, the Good Vibes running through my veins until he said my most awaited answer to my question. " I HAVE A BAD NEWS FOR YOU" from that 7 words that came straight from his mouth, i felt that the second floor of our house collapsed on me. my tears are trying to escape from my eyes, but i control it. I don't want my "supposed to be future" boss hear it, nor feel the sadness from my voice. I even asked him about RE-APPEAL but he is not interested with it, instead he told me he will turn over my case to another Agency, but this time i need to pay for any money that they will ask from me.
I am so depressed, super mega duper depressed. I feel so sorry for my self, self-pity. I feel so sorry with Dwi. I don't want him to do all the work and me, just stay at home wife who do all cleaning stuffs. I am not against being a housewife, in fact i am a organize person. but i believe that i can do both, I can do everything at the same time. That's what i want. do work outside and do work inside. i want to feel that i am not a useless person, i don't want my 4 years of studying this degree will go straight again in dustbin, yes, i know i threw it before but can't you see i am trying to pick up the pieces of me.
I am truly sorry for a very emotional me today. I am just so sad and depressed. right now, while typing this tears are coming out, i already burst in tears.
Dwi said, Life is like that. which i agree. Maybe i am not used to it. maybe because since college, i am starting to work my ass. and this is the first time that i stayed so long without a job.
Oh gosh please enlighten me....
I am so depressed.
I am
So, the 2 weeks finally came and i was so excited and nervous to ask for a new update from my "future" boss, his voice sound okay and happy, no trace of sadness so it gave me positive hope. I can feel the Good News, the Good Vibes running through my veins until he said my most awaited answer to my question. " I HAVE A BAD NEWS FOR YOU" from that 7 words that came straight from his mouth, i felt that the second floor of our house collapsed on me. my tears are trying to escape from my eyes, but i control it. I don't want my "supposed to be future" boss hear it, nor feel the sadness from my voice. I even asked him about RE-APPEAL but he is not interested with it, instead he told me he will turn over my case to another Agency, but this time i need to pay for any money that they will ask from me.
I am so depressed, super mega duper depressed. I feel so sorry for my self, self-pity. I feel so sorry with Dwi. I don't want him to do all the work and me, just stay at home wife who do all cleaning stuffs. I am not against being a housewife, in fact i am a organize person. but i believe that i can do both, I can do everything at the same time. That's what i want. do work outside and do work inside. i want to feel that i am not a useless person, i don't want my 4 years of studying this degree will go straight again in dustbin, yes, i know i threw it before but can't you see i am trying to pick up the pieces of me.
I am truly sorry for a very emotional me today. I am just so sad and depressed. right now, while typing this tears are coming out, i already burst in tears.
Dwi said, Life is like that. which i agree. Maybe i am not used to it. maybe because since college, i am starting to work my ass. and this is the first time that i stayed so long without a job.
Oh gosh please enlighten me....
I am so depressed.
I am
No comments:
Post a Comment