Another night that i can't sleep due to a lot of thoughts been running inside my head. thoughts that i'm quite hesitant to blog about because i don't want to say something "mean" or "nasty" to other people, but i guess i need to do this not only for me or for them but actually to all the people in the whole world to understand what marriage all about.
I originally think to title this Blog "DEAR EX-FRIENDS"but i changed my ideas as "sometimes" i just thought that they are only saying all those things about married life due to novel, movies or realities show that tackles marriage life, not by personal / self experience because they haven't get married or even not attached to someone.
Anyway, everybody knows that marriage life is about two opposite people who decided to become one, but the deeper meaning of that; of what exactly marriage life means is "NOBODY KNOWS". you see different people have different point of view in life, maybe few things they can agree but not all of it. If two individuals decided to become one, nobody knows what kind of future they have. it will always depends on how they will deal things.
there is no perfect couple, maybe only "rare" couple don't fight. but me and my husband as a normal being, we argue a lot and we love a lot. we hurt each other, we cried, we laugh it's just a crazy world that only married people will know,even though you are mad at your spouse you can't hide the fact that you love him/her.
you probably hear a thing or two when he/she needs someone to talk to because he/she's not happy or depressed about their other half. i think it's normal that they spoke to their closest friend JUST TO LET IT OUT WHAT'S INSIDE. It's okay, but i think the best advised that i hear from my friend is, "you should talk to your spouse"
Nobody's perfect, a good example is our situation, most probably they think i am controlling. but deep inside of me i don't want to be controlling as me myself don't want to be controlled. For you it's controlling but for me it's disciplining and letting my husband know about prioritizing. because i felt that he got a problem in "prioritizing" in every aspect of his life because i know my husband is not perfect. Just like the other night, he told me he's going to meet his friend for dinner, i didn't told him "NO DON'T GO" instead i agree with it, hoping that he will come back not so late or perhaps before i reached home. He knows my schedule, I ONLY GOT ONE OFF DAY IN EVERY WEEK AND ONE WEEK IN EVERY MONTH THAT I CAN GO HOME EARLY. for those people who doesn't know my husband working in the morning and i am working at night. every time he's going to work i am sleeping and every time i go back from work he's already sleeping. "almost" everyday he's having dinner with this same people / friends. what i am asking is a time for me. i am not asking him to "DON'T SLEEP UNTIL 5 in the morning, WAIT FOR ME UNTIL I COME BACK". you see the difference.
Well, anyway people can say a lot of things behind someone's back, because i do that. maybe in their mind i am a very bad wife a "treated me like princess" wife. but they can only say and say and say because they are not the one who's sleeping with my husband under in the same roof. i just hope that once you finally see your other half, hope that he/she won't hit your head against the concrete wall, that he/she wont kick you when he is happy or annoyed to you, that he/she won't leave you alone at home and chooses to be with his friends in the middle of your shivering due to a freaking high fever, hope that he/she's not lazy in helping you out in doing household chores, hope that he/she's not sharing your "ME and MY SPOUSE TIME" with your friends, etc etc etc. i might be sounds so complaining but actually i am not, i just don't have any idea on how i should let you know that "YOU ARE NOT EXPERT"
Have you heard about this saying "The FIRST YEAR OR TWO YEARS OF MARRIAGE LIFE IS THE ADJUSTMENT TIME" But i guess, even though you heard of it you won't understand it only those who are in 10 years or 11 years or whoever that survived on that period can understand it.
another saying, "EXPERIENCE IS THE BEST TEACHER IN LIFE" now my question is, do you have any experience? Think about it. Even us, our experience in this marriage life is not yet enough. So who are you to lecture things, if you and yourself haven't experience? that's why there's always a FREE TESTER in every mall.
bottom line is, you are out of the group of two. just like what my bestfriend always tell me when i share my family problem. HE CAN ALWAYS LISTEN BUT HE CANNOT GIVE WORDS. a very well said from a married person.
Haist. tons of things i want to say but since i felt that i will start to become mean i should better sleep.
one last saying, if you fight with an immature people, then how do you label yourself? :)
Goodnight!
